Martin (John Amplas), a young man who looks around 20-years-old, boards a train in Indianapolis, Indiana for New York. At night, he breaks into a sleeping car and sedates a woman with a syringe full of narcotics. She struggles, but he tells her not to struggle or be upset because she wont feel pain. After a few minutes, the woman falls asleep, and Martin has sex with the unconscious woman. Afterwards, he slices her wrists with a razor blade so he can drink her blood. The woman bleeds to death in her sleep.
In the morning, the train stops in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania where Martin disembarks. He is met by Tata Cuda (Lincoln Maazel) an elderly and hostile old man who claims to be his cousin from the Old World. Together, they travel by another train to the town of Braddock, a dying industrial suburb. They walk to Cuda's large house where he shows Martin his living quarters. Cuda then accuses Martin of being an 84-year-old vampire from his old country. He has taken in Martin because he is family, but tells him, "First I will save your soul. Then I shall destroy you." Martin denies being a vampire and implies that Cuda is merely his uncle rather than his cousin. Cuda then puts up strings of garlic on the doors to his and his granddaughter's room, and then holds up a small cross when Martin approaches him. Martin takes away the cross, and even takes a bite of the garlic mocking these attempts by saying bitterly, "There's no real magic... ever". Cuda tells Martin that he can come and go as he pleases. But he also warns Martin that he will kill him if he kills anyone in Braddock. He also tells Martin to stay away from his granddaughter Christine (Christine Forrest), whom arrives home from her job that evening.
Cuda introduces Christine to Martin, but also warns her to stay away from him. But Christine instead strikes up a friendship with Martin who confides in her about his vampire heritage. When Cuda later confirms Martin's claims to be a vampire, Christine, not surprisingly, refuses to believe either one. She thinks that Cuda and the other members of her family have driven Martin to insanity by making him think that he is a vampire. It is never revealed if Martin really is a vampire, or just a shy and lonely youth with troubled issues. Christine is the only person that Martin gets the courage to talk to. When Christine's boyfriend Arthur (Tom Savini) arrives at the house for dinner, Martin stops talking and backs away despite Arthur's attempt at a conversation. Christine later confides in Martin that she hopes to leave Braddock someday with Arthur, even though Martin points out that Arthur treats her badly and is both verbally and physically abusive towards her.
When Christine sees that Martin won't talk to anyone else, she buys him a phone which he installs in his room. Martin begins to repeatingly call a radio talk show where he describes what it's like to be a vampire. He becomes known on the radio as "the Count" to all the listeners. But the patronizing host (Michael Gornick) thinks he's just crazy.
Martin gets a job at Cuda's grocery store of stocking shelves, hauling boxes around, and even gets to be a delivery boy for some of the customers. One of his customers is a certain Abby Santini (Elyane Nadeau), who becomes taken in with Martin. She is a very friendly young woman who is depressed when she tells Martin that her husband is unfaithful. But Martin still does not have the nerve to talk with her, so she is happy to have someone to confide in with her life problems. Martin phones the radio show host to describe his infatuation with the housewife and senses that she wants to have sex with him. When the radio show host asks Martin if it is a sexual problem that he has involving women criticizing him during sex, Martin replies that he has never had sex with a woman who was awake.
One day, Martin travels by train to outside Braddock to look for victims. At a supermarket, he follows a young woman (Sarah Venable) home to her posh suburban house. He sees the woman's husband (Richard Rubenstein) leave for a long business trip, and Martin decides this would be the right time for more feeding. Martin returns to the house after dark and breaks in through the garage door. But it is Martin who gets the surprise when he bursts into her bedroom to find her in bed with her adulterous lover Lewis (Al Levitsky). After a vicious struggle, Martin jabs both of them with hyprodermic needles with narcotics, and waits for the drugs to take affect. He drags the unconscious body of Lewis from the house to a clump of trees across the street where he kills him by shoving a broken tree branch into his neck and drinks his blood. Martin returns to the house where he has sex with the unconscious woman. But out of compassion and pity, he decides to let her live.
Martin begins to have romantic monochrome visions of his vampire past (real or imagined), where he drained blood from a young woman and was chased through the streets of a nameless European town by a torch-lit mob.
During one Sunday at church, Cuda brings home Father Howard (George A. Romero) who asks him about the possibility of exorcism and demon possession. Father Howard calls upon the elderly Father Zulemans (Clifford Forrest, Jr.) over at Cuda's request. Together, Cuda and Zulemans confront Martin his bedroom and attempt to perform an exorcism on him. At this point, Martin remembers (another real or imaginary flashback), in the Old Country of people trying to perform an exorcism on him, and he flees them. Martin then flees from Cuda and Zuelmas as well. A little later that night, Martin terrorizes Cuda in a children's playground when he puts on a Dracula cape and puts false fangs into his mouth to pretend that he really is a vampire.
One day, Martin finally musters the courage to talk with Mrs. Santini during a routine delivery to her house where he tells her that he's aware of her attempts to seduce him and wants now to have sex with her. After having sex for the first time, Mrs. Santini becomes more depressed for she tells Martin that her husband just left her because she discovered that she cannot bear children, and that her desires towards him are based on sex and nothing else. But Martin wants to stay with her and help her move on with her life. Martin tells the radio show host about his affair with the housewife and that he no longer has the urge to attack other women.
Meanwhile, Arthur meets with Cuda and tells him that he wants Christine to leave town with him so they can get married and start a family. But Christine becomes angry at Cuda when he tells Arthur that insanity runs in their family and he shouldn't consider having children with her. Shortly afterwards, Christine packs up and leaves Braddock for New York with Arthur despite Martin telling her that Arthur is abusive towards her. But her mind is made up. Before leaving, Christine tells Martin that she really has no ill feelings towards him and just wants to make a fresh start with her life. She says goodbye to him and promises to write. But Martin knows that with an abusive and possessive man in Christine's life, she probably won't.
Depressed over losing his one true friend, Martin phones the radio show host and tells him that he's getting "shaky" and wants to go out looking for more victims. That night, Martin travels to a rough crime-ridden area of Pittsburgh and attacks two derelicts in a alley, injecting them with narcotics. He kills one of them by silting the bum's wrist and drinking his blood. Martin is about to kill the second one when a police car shows up and gives chase. Martin narrowly escapes during a long chase on foot which leads from the garbage strew streets and through a local store. Martin runs into an old warehouse where a drug deal is going down. A shootout between the two cops and the three thugs begins where all of them are killed, leaving Martin as the sole survivor who casually walks away from the carnage.
One day, Martin finds Mrs. Santini dead in her bathtub, after she had slit her writs with a razor blade. Martin anonymously calls the police to report the body and leaves. He phones the radio show host one final time to say that he really doesn't need friends or people to talk to for he is his own person. But when Cuda learns about Mrs. Santini's suicide, is mistakenly thinks Martin killed her and made it look like a suicide as he's done before. Cuda walks into Martin's room while he is asleep and kills him by hammering a wooden stake through Martin's heart.
Cuda buries Martin's body in his back garden, while over the closing credits various voices from people are heard talking to the radio show host asking the whereabouts of "the Count".
群戏台词写得挺有意思的，不过也就仅此而已，可算是知道那些土狗艺术展都是谁在买账了，能得到我尊重的是真正的生活，不是手握上海几套房衣食无忧的文艺青年讲的俏皮话。
演员的表演都还在线，这剧本可能做成舞台剧更好， 但如果要进入现实影像，现在这个状态是不令人满意的；影片所呈现的上海，缺少真实市井生活的那种烟火气，就像个浮在半空的斑斓肥皂泡，过于虚幻了， 特别是为了突出这座城市国际化程度的那些设定， 显得既刻意又做作；本片最大的亮点就是沪语对白， 特别还有粗口，这个的确非常稀罕，这也许是在本地土著中引起观影热潮的一个原因吧
曾经的事情已经被用旧，回不去也到不达远方，可当下仍在蒸腾的泡沫里消耗着。精致的，遮掩的，情怀的，市井的，虔诚的，无用的，交汇的，断裂的，真真假假都没关系，就让生活这样继续吧。
B先生这种自在的杂家不少，现实生活里有几套房休闲做杂家的就不多了。。。
非常难得在大荧幕看到上海话的电影，也是华语爱情电影中少有的诉说中年人爱情的故事，还是挺好看的，越往后面越好。缺点是徐峥这个角色没什么魅力，虽说“平凡”的人不需要多潇洒，但老白这么吃重戏份的角色如果无法让观众共情和喜欢是蛮遗憾的…反观三位女性，都很喜欢的，上海女人！嗲！
妈的真的好好看好好看❤，好讨厌那些把这片子和费里尼比的朋友们呜呜呜，不同视角评价确实好，但反正我是100个夸，还有作为在上海活了二十余年的老头子我觉得这上海滤镜害蛮自然，喜欢🌹🌹🌹
想到阶级，想到有钱人们的虚无，想到中国其他地方的苦难，当然以上都不是对这个电影觉得不好的理由，只是看的时候难以避免地想到并难受了。 有很多女性主义的段落，但也难免觉得是在讨好男性的同时讨好女性。乳化梗太棒。问题还是太散，前半部分后精彩，后面太突兀，不管是女人们的突然关系变好还是母子、夫妻、父子关系的变化，更何况都是依托在一个突然的死亡上，就更觉得刻意俗套。 不过生活中这样突然死亡也确实会震撼亲友的吧。 21.21.30夜与z 马伊琍和倪虹洁在布展馆的影子一幕太美 总的来说还是很符合导演出那本书的感觉的 韩寒旗下的one一个系列的风格
北电毕业卖电子烟，这个梗出来之后全场只有我在笑，谁懂
「和索菲亚罗兰的故事，感人吧？我编的。」一开始觉得文艺报菜名有点硬，到最后渐入佳境，沪味正浓。剧情离散，爱却真实。
老乌说，我们现在是这里的主人，但前三代可是客人。上海外来人员的奋斗史，到了反客为主的这一代可以调侃和自嘲，背后还是深知和体察人的不易，才有这般通透和轻盈。电影很难得没有架空城市背景，人物扎根在电影构筑的城市空间，随着空间流动而生成新的情感。这个故事不会出现在闸北，只能出现在永康路一带。
前四分之三都挺好看的。 剧感大于电影感。 虽然我知道那个叫夜奔的咖啡店是和那家叫红拂的杂货店一起的（导演网名），但是看到一名曾经演过林冲的演员在一家叫做夜奔的店里喝咖啡的时候，那感觉还是挺好玩的。 对倪虹洁的上一个印象还是“放着我来”的无双，没想到直接开始进行离婚局了。 另外仔细想想，一男两女三主角，全是有钱有闲人，演点神话也正常。
自信又轻巧，锐利又宽阔，处处埋梗又不破梗，像是给文艺中年人的一封情书，伍迪艾伦in a shanghai way。
四星+
感觉这剧本是坂元裕二写出来的，当然还有这北电戏文专业练就的会写段子的伶牙俐齿。最后的镜头挺好，最让人感动的老乌的故事感觉像是“青年破处”版广岛之恋。
的确是一个情感细腻的电影，都在细微之处，而生活大多时候哪有波澜壮阔，都是细节构成的。。。
能够見出許多方面的電影/文學傳統，例如法國香頌般的都市小品、伍迪·艾倫的片子、“愛在”三部曲，還有上海的通俗文藝傳統。能把這三個女人的一臺戲拍得俗而不“油”，原因在於影片從不試圖展現絕對的人設和極端的感情，同時在把這整件事拍出來之外，並不刻意誘導觀眾勒索更豐沛的意義。儘管主人公的生活狀態又讓我想到王朔筆下的某些北京人，但該片仍可說是只在上海並只以吳語進行方可成立的文本；它提供的是一套非生產性、同時高度去道德化的消費社會的感情圖景，而且特重女性切身的生活體驗：前現代的浪漫主義文化中的“癡情”/“愛情至上”，被指認為現代城市生活中的一種“神話”，它照亮了都市的夜空，卻也讓人們不以為意。另尤其體現劇作能力的一點是鞋匠的設置，這一掃地僧角色起到了故事旁觀者和“評點”者的作用。2021年12月24日於金逸達鏢。
自从老乌讲述不知是否真实的索菲亚·罗兰开始，电影的市井气息就遭到了“破坏”，进而变成了一场关于上海的梦了。老乌死去，新闻上的索菲亚·罗兰幸存，媒介与现实交织，在虚构的魔法以后留下荒凉与悲伤，承担这一切的是老白对于老乌的怀念。
感觉蛮好玩的！看得也开心，选角特别懂😂 就是我觉得这个电影里的人都太会用语言表达自己了，其实现实生活中我们会遇到很多不善言辞（但可以通过其他方面表达自己）的人。所以我觉得ta有点太紧太密集了，几乎没有停下输出的时刻，感觉可以更松弛一点，打个不太恰当的比方如果艾伦索金哪天写这种片子大概效果类似，语言是整个片子最重要的势能（很有意思的是随着片子推进语言明里暗里交锋甚至感觉每个人脑袋上顶着一个不断变化的分数）。片头小番茄特写带到后面抱着一盆番茄的老乌、老白修电灯李小姐母女吵架交代人物背景、玛雅第二次透露母亲年龄三段写得有点妙。做菜大概是老白孔雀开屏的方式，电影一开始就是孔雀开屏，他最后一次给大家备菜（夜宵）时没了这种心态，纯粹为了饱腹。但就在这最后一次他好像得到了一直以来想要的东西，哈哈。
3.5 平行时空的微型乌托邦，人与人之间的联结轻巧又通透，小资情调与家长里短可以和谐共生，爱情不问来由不去解释只管发生。虽始终笼罩着一种段子集锦的氛围，却凭这股在自成腔调与做作输出边界线游走的劲头儿，足以在荤腥油腻的国片环境里突出它的清淡可口。很值得牵着爱人的手一起愉悦观看~（「乳化」那段很难不爆笑）
不一样的地方是两性关系的设定不再刻板狗血，反而都是活生生有自己想法的独立人格人，每个年龄段都是。
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